Hi, this is Jessica Sawicki from Luli Sleep Consulting. And today on the Sleepy Q’s podcast, we’re going to be discussing night feeds. So our babies are born with the need to feed constantly. Newborns especially need to feed about every one to two hours. This can take a toll on us parents as we’re up all night feeding. But how can we manage these feeds? And how long do these night feeds really need to happen? Does your child need to feed far beyond the three or four months? These are all great questions that we’re going to dive into.
Newborns need to eat regularly in the early months
First, let’s talk about what these middle of the night feeds are. Night feeds are all the feeds that happen after bedtime throughout the night until morning wake-up time. So during those first few months, your newborn will need to feed often, especially the first three months. I strongly suggest to follow your child’s feeding cues. Their feeding sleep cycles change a lot, some nights, they’ll feed two times, other nights they’ll feed up to four times. In the beginning they also go through a lot of growth spurts that can affect their feeding schedules. Three, six, nine. Remember those three numbers: three, six, nine. Three weeks, six weeks, nine weeks. And then again at the months; three months, six months and nine months.
So those first three to four months, you are constantly feeding your little one in a 24-hour period. During the day, I suggest you wake your newborn to feed, so she doesn’t skip a daytime feed. At night, a lot of pediatrician suggested not to wake the child. Some pediatricians will tell you to wake your child. So I find this to be a very personal preference. A lot of it has to do with you and your child; your child’s capability of lasting. So how often your child wakes up, and how often your child needs to feed at night. Every child is different.
So how many feeds do they really need at night? On average, newborns need to feed every couple of hours. As I mentioned earlier, those first three months, your baby will need to feed often. As often as every one to two hours .
Your baby will need middle of the night feeds the first four months or more. A lot of parents confuse the idea that the child needs to be a certain weight in order to start decreasing feeds. Or that the child is 12 weeks old and can go a full 12 hours without a feed. This is a very big misconception! If your child is 12 weeks old and is a certain weight, does not necessarily mean that she can go the whole night without a feed. Remember, this means 11 to 12 hours without a feed. And that’s a lot for a 12 week old!
Feeding needs change as babies grow older
Between the ages of four to six months, most babies will need anywhere between zero to two feeds at night. Some babies will still need a feed at six months. But most will start dropping their feeds at around six months of age. By nine months, your child should have dropped all night feeds.
However, how do you wait until then to start decreasing or start structuring those feeds? Can you really start working on decreasing those feeds or at least structuring them before the nine month period? Absolutely! You can start working on them around four months old in order for it to get a little bit easier for you, and for your child. And so that we can get a little bit more sleep.
Introduce feedings as dream feeds
So how do you do it? One way I like to recommend my clients is to keep those feeds as dream feeds. Dream feeds are to be done when your child is completely asleep, not awake. Why? Because this helps remove the association of feeding to sleep. So, how do you do a dream feed? Well, when your child is completely asleep, you will pick her up, feed her, and then put her right back down into the crib asleep. This is opposite to a set time feed. In a set time feed, you wait until your child wakes up and then feed her. This type of feed, the set time feed, can sometimes cause a little bit of a confusion between wake, feed, and back to sleep association. Where the dream feed is done when she’s completely asleep. In this case, she is not aware that she’s getting fed. And even if she does wake up later, you will feel comfortable and confident that she’s already fed and she’s not hungry for this next wake up.
So depending on how many feeds your child needs at night, you will pick one or two specific times in the middle of the night and you will do them as dream feeds. I usually suggest doing the two feeds at 10:00 PM and at 2:00 AM, or at 11:00 PM and 3:00 AM. So 10 and 2, or 11 and 3. That way you split up the night in increments of four hours and your baby will not go more than four hours without a feed. So you pick the times, and you stick to the same time every single night. You will go in there quietly, pick up your baby feed and then put her right back down asleep. This will help in the first part of removing those feeds when it’s time to do so.
Check with your pediatrician
When can you get rid of those night feeds? I’m sure you’re asking. Great question! Let’s talk about what need to happen before you remove those feeds. So before removing any middle of the night feeds, I strongly suggest getting the approval from your pediatrician. Your pediatrician has been with you along the way. Making sure that your child is growing in a healthy manner, gaining weight as needed and growing. He will be able to give you the okay, before going ahead and removing those feeds. You want to make sure that your child is gaining weight those first few months and continues to do so, even if you were to remove one of those feeds.
You know your child best
And secondly, before we move the feeds is the age, let me start off by saying; every child is different. Some babies will need to feed far longer than others. And some babies will be able to remove those middle of the night feeds far younger than others. So you really have to know what your child is capable of doing. So you really have to know what your child is capable, but as far as the age, most will drop feeds between four to six months old.
Ways to drop the feedings
Now, how would you remove these feeds? Great question. I often suggest removing one feed at a time. So as to not to make a big change for your baby or for you, if you’re breastfeeding. Now if your baby takes a bottle at night, then that’s an easy solution. Just decrease two ounces, every two days. That way you’re slowly decreasing the amount of ounces she feeds at night, and it gives your child some time to adjust to less and eventually no more feeds. So for instance, if you’re giving your child a six ounce bottle at 10:00 PM, you will go down to four ounces at 10:00 PM for two nights. Then down to two ounces at 10:00 PM for two nights, and then zero.
Now, if you’re breastfeeding, I actually often suggest rather than decreasing the time, because this can be a little bit tricky, start moving over the feed closer to the next one. So you would move it closer by one hour, every two nights. So what would that look like? Let’s say for instance, you’re doing a feed at 10:00 PM and at 2:00 AM. You would first move the 2:00 AM to 1:00 AM. So then you would do a 10:00 PM and a 1:00 AM feed for two nights. Then you would do a 10:00 PM and a 12:00 AM for two nights and so on. So you would eventually merge those two feeds to one where they meet at within an hour difference. So 10 and 11:00 PM. Once they’ve met there, you’re down to one feed that you can start doing at around 10:00/10:30 at night. So if you’re a breastfeeding, I actually suggest doing that; moving them over and over. There are some moms who actually like to just decrease the timing, rather than moving it over. So if you’re able to time your child at those feeds, figure out how long she’s naturally feeding for, and then start decreasing it by a couple of minutes, every two days. So if she normally feeds 10 minutes at each feed, you will start decreasing that second feed at 2:00 AM down to about six to eight minutes. Spend a couple of nights doing six to eight minutes. Then, only let her feed for four to six minutes for a couple of nights, and then unlatch her. And slowly decrease the time every couple of nights.
Once you worked on removing one feed, I suggest giving your child a couple of days to adjust to that one feed at night, before you work on removing the other feed. You really don’t want to remove both feeds at the same time so quickly. You can either wait a couple of days, or a couple of weeks, or a couple of months. That’s up to you as far as your child’s age and what your goals are.
So remember night feeds are extremely common, a must, those first three to four months. Anywhere between four to six months, you can start working on organizing those feeds or start decreasing those feeds. Remember, you need your pediatrician’s approval and you want to make sure that your child is capable of going the night without one or two feeds. Most babies will decrease their feeds at six months. And anywhere between six to nine months go to zero feeds. So as you can see, every child is different and I would strongly suggest doing what you think is best and what your pediatrician thinks is best for your child. Thanks so much.
